"they say the owl was a baker's daughter. lord, we know what we are, but know not what we may be." (Hamlet, Act IV, Scene 5)

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Sunday, August 22, 2010

1001 Ways to Lose With the Shoes: Just Average July August

I know, I know ... you're probably all thinking that I forgot to write a blog post in July and that I am probably going to forget again in August too. A-ha! NO SUCH LUCK. Suckers.

I haven't had much time to write blog posts about my boring life, because I have been going cross-eyed grading papers, writing project plans, and trying to decipher the four-page, seven-column, tri-colored, school supply list for my children. I had NO IDEA that one child could possibly need to so many varieties of glue (but no pencil box?), or that it could take fourteen hours in the school supply aisle of Target to locate the last-standing 1.5-inch, soft-cloth, three-ring, zipper-snap-velcro-close, durable, bottom-folder, binder. I'll be honest. I'm not proud. I didn't even know there was such a thing as a 1.5-inch soft-cloth, three-ring, zipper-snap-velcro-close, durable, bottom-folder binder. But I found it.

Hell yeah, I did.

In other news, I've been working. Watching way too much "Real Housewives of New Jersey" (did someone say train wreck because I simply cannot look away?), and listening to a lot (too much) American Top 40 (don't even act like you don't have Adam Lambert or Lady Gaga in your iTunes library.).

Well, it's not all AT40 all the time. I've been digging back, way back, into my old school archives, and stumbled upon this little gem in my iTunes library. Just when you thought you couldn't love Ray Allen more (and I might never be done loving Chuck D.)

It's also been hotter than Hades out here on the Atlantic Coast this summer (Al Gore, I've got your number. Global warming is for the birds). This heat, combined with my recent obsession with hot vinyasa yoga, makes me think that I have probably sweated out all of my genetic material and every last possible ounce of hydration that my body might have ever hoped to retain. On the bright side, sometimes, after leaving yoga, it actually feels cool outside, when the heat index is 103 degrees with 571% humidity. Also, as widely chronicled on Facebook, I also flipped my dog, popped out a wheel, and somehow managed a fully bound extended side angle. I think I might look taller now.

How do my boys deal with this heat? Easy. They play Twister on their Twister beach towel, courtesy of Miss Sara who always finds the best gifts everrrrrr. When it comes to gift-giving, she really makes the rest of us look lame.

I hope this update isn't a tragic disappointment. In the words of Adam Lambert, "Whadd'ya want from me?" Not much to report: It's Just Average, July August.